The Sex Ninja
by LemonyWickedAwesome
Summary: If your curious as to what the title means, read it and find out. LEMONS! Rated M for a reason.


**Lemony:** Flamers get on my last nerve but annoyance is part of life, now I've been "reported" because the last story I wrote was a Q&A (you readers know the one called "Would You Rather") So, I'm continuing writing what I want, when I want, without giving a damn. *shrugs* Hey, flamers are perfect inspiration. Thanks you guys! You made me feel special! ;)

**Wicked:** Wait you're not upset that you've been flamed?

**Lemony:** Why should I be? They don't like my work, there's nothing I can do about that but keep writing to please the people who do.

**Wicked:** *arches eyebrow in shock* Well, this is new tone coming from you.

**Awesome:** *nods in approval* That's very mature of you little sis. I've been telling you to ingore those guys since the very beginning.

**Lemony:**...NO YOU HAVEN'T! Anyways, enjoy the story! peoples!

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><p>The Sex Ninja<p>

_Yes, he's the sex ninja, the man dressed all in black. Better be careful, better watch your back, he's waiting for the perfect moment to attack. He knows your weakness, he knows its your tight sweetness. He targets girls who need sex the worst! He might be your first! He'll fuck you til' it hurts! he'll fuck you til' you burst! He's never been caught! He's never been scorned! Lock your doors, bolt your windows, dear girls! Because you have been warned..._

Rukia Kuchiki frowned as she ran across campus. She was going to be late for class if she didn't hustle! The girl ran with her small arms full of school books that were thicker than dictionaries and a backpack almost twice the size of her own body loaded up with essays and portfolios. The only thing she could hear was her own huffing and puffing. If Rukia kept this up her lungs were going to explode.

This was a terrible way to start her Sophomore year at university. With classes in session it would be difficult for her to find a seat close to the board so that Rukia's sponge of a brain would soak up all of the valuable information. Rukia was starting to think this was going to be one of the worst semesters of her young life!

First, she had the class schedule from hell! Rukia's classes included: Advanced Topics in Quantum Mechanics, Topics in Metaphysics and Epistemology, Advanced Trigonometry 55, Philosophy of Law, and Social Theory! Those weren't even sophomore-level courses! But somehow, Rukia's outstanding high school grades and letters of recommendation not only got her into college, it also got her into the world's hardest freaking classes that ever existed. What the fuck was Quantum Mechanics anyways? Not to mention she had a part-time job as a library assistant, and was pledging for a sorority. Can you say "stressed" three times fast?

Little Rukia kept running and running and running some more. She was going so fast, Rukia didn't even hear the following phrase:

"Head's up!"

Before Rukia could even respond, she was ass out. At that moment, the younger Kuchiki had little blue birds fluttering around her dizzy head. Why the fuck was her face numb all of sudden? Turns out, the poor kid's head got used as a backboard, because she'd got hit by a flying, hard-ass basketball!

The next thing she knew, Rukia was staring at a pair of large, white sneakers running over to her.

"Oh dear..." Someone purred, "How unfortunate. Are you alright?"

Rukia replied as a young man helped her up, "Hell no I'm not alright! You hit me with a freaking basketball!"

The very minute Rukia looked up she came face to face with a smiling, silver-haired young man. That man was none other than Gin Ichimaru. Here's a little history on dear Gin: He was a junior at university who attended school on a full-ride scholarship, and was captain of the basketball team. Gin was considered to be somewhat odd because of his abnormal slenderness and broad happy-face smile, but what really set him apart was his mercury-silver locks.

He'd been hanging out on his day off.

"My, we aren't very friendly," Gin purred to the dizzy girl, "Why are you so upset? I said I was sorry..."

Rukia was finally getting some feeling back in her cheeks. She didn't even bother to glare at the silver-haired athlete.

"I'm gonna be late for class..." She muttered as she quickly rounded up her books and tried to brush past Gin. He cut her off.

"My name is Gin, let me at least make it up to you for hitting you in that pretty little face of yours," He hummed, "Let me carry your things to class..."

Rukia didn't even give him a response. Instead, Gin could only see the back of her head as she bolted across the campus to her next class. He shook his head slightly and watched her go. The smirking man looked down momentarily and saw a piece paper laying at his feet. Gin cocked his head and picked it up. He smirked. Rukia was in such a rush to get to class, she'd dropped her course schedule.

But inwardly, Gin was smiling like a spoiled kid on Christmas morning. Little Rukia was so stressed...that couldn't be healthy at all...

* * *

><p>The day was finally over. Rukia tiredly dragged her feet out of the lecture hall and groggily trudged all the way back across campus. The sooner she got to her dorm, the sooner she could pass the hell out! Oh wait, that's right; Rukia couldn't go straight to sleep because she had a thesis paper due tomorrow! With that on her mind, the raven-haired girl changed her course of direction and headed to one of the many on-campus convenience stores. Maybe a pot full of coffee could help her pull yet another all-nighter. Upon walking inside, Rukia stopped momentarily at whom she saw standing behind the counter.<p>

"Well, well, we meet again..." Gin purred, propping his elbow up on the counter. Rukia just looked at him and then shrugged uncaringly. She came here for coffee, not polite conversation. She had a paper to write!

Rukia's tired blue eyes scanned the small store. It was like any other convenience store; it had aisles, overpriced junk food, and some of the other crap convenience stores keep lying around.

"Where's your coffee?" Rukia asked Gin, who smiled broadly.

"Sorry cutie," He hummed, "But this store stops brewing at 11 a.m."

Rukia's face fell, "You've gotta be kidding me."

"Nope," Gin sighed, "You could try something else though,"

"Like what?"

"Getting some rest."

Rukia rolled her eyes so hard she threatened to knock herself out! So not only did this guy go upside her head with a basketball, he was denying her precious caffeine! (**Lemony:** I'd kill em, lol)

The raven-haired huffed and stormed out of the store leaving Gin standing behind the counter chuckling to himself.

That girl was going to work herself to death if someone didn't do something...

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><p>Now back in her own dorm, Rukia stared intently at her computer screen while her dainty fingers attacked the keyboard. She was typing so fast her hands looked blurred. Sitting in the darkness of her dorm, Rukia focused what little energy she had left into finishing her thesis. The poor girl was racing against time and losing miserably. In all honesty, this particular paper wouldn't be due for another week, Rukia just had a bad habit of finishing assignments the day it was given to her. By now, Rukia was fighting to stay awake as she continued typing. After she was finished with her essay, she could study up because she had midterms in a month.<p>

Again, can you say "stressed" three times fast?

Rukia was forgetting the most important rule about going to college: take time to enjoy yourself.

Suddenly there was a knock at her door. Rukia sighed and answered, it was her dorm-mate Orihime Inoue.

"Rukia," Orihime stopped talking when she got a look at her friend, Rukia's hair was frazzled and dull, there were black rings under her eyes that were so dark Orihime nearly mistaken the younger Kuchiki for a raccoon. Basically, Rukia looked like a hot, ghetto mess. Orihime cocked an eyebrow,

"Were you up all night again?" She asked,

"Uh yeah kinda..." Rukia replied sheepishly rubbing the back of her neck, Orihime shook her head.

"Do you know what time it is?"

This time Rukia shook her own head. She was so fixated on her paper that she wasn't watching the clock.

"Its 8:30 in the morning!" Orihime exclaimed, Rukia nearly had a conniption fit! Her next class was in ten minutes!

"Excuse the hell outta me, Orihime," Rukia sputtered quickly, "But I gotta go!"

Rukia, quite literally, bunny-hooped over the big-breasted girl and bolted out of her dormitory. This shit had to stop...

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><p>Orihime sat in the crowded cafeteria and waited for Rukia to show up for lunch. Surely enough, Rukia dragged herself across the packed lunchroom and collapsed in the chair across from Orihime. Rukia couldn't even support her head anymore and it flopped onto the table with a loud thud. Seconds later, Orihime heard her friend's light snoring. She giggled, Orihime really couldn't help it. Rukia was taking this whole "college" thing way to seriously. Playfully, the orange-haired girl nudged her friend.<p>

"WHAT I LEARNED IN QUANTUM PYSHICS TODAY IS…!" Rukia cried thinking she was back in the lecture hall, Orihime cracked up laughing at her outburst. A hot, pink blush crept across Rukia's cheeks as everyone in the cafeteria stared at her as if she was stark, raving nuts. She quietly lowered her head as a low whisper fell over the people in the room. Meanwhile, Orihime was gripping her sides and trying not to explode from laughter.

"Oh my god, Rukia!" She laughed, "You're gonna have a heart attack, relax."

"Sorry, I'm just tired." Rukia responded resting her head on the table, "Is Sophomore year over yet?"

"Nope, you've another semester to go." Orihime said munching on a french-fry, "You better be careful before you get attacked by the Sex Ninja."

Rukia looked at Orihime sideways, "The Sex what?"

"Sex _Ninja_." Orihime answered nonchalantly, "I heard he sleeps with girls who are really stressed and stuff. He sneaks around wearing all black and getting into girls dorms, its really weird but cool."

"A guy breaking into people's dorms and then sleeping with them?" Rukia mused aloud, "That sounds like rape."

Orihime shrugged, "No one has complained about it so far. You might wanna watch out though, you'd make a perfect target."

"Oh please," Rukia said rolling her eyes, "That's an STD waiting to happen."

"Ok, but don't say I didn't warn you…"

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><p>Once again, Rukia found herself locked away in her dark, little room in the dead of night staring idly at her computer screen. What was she working on now, you ask? An extra credit assignment even though she didn't really need it. The only sound she could hear were the buttons on her keyboard screaming at her to stop! A sudden chuckle made Rukia freeze.<p>

In slow-motion, Rukia turned around to see a man sitting cross-legged on her window seal dressed all in black! Holy shit! There was a burglar in her room! Panicked, Rukia started hurling books at him, the mysterious man dodged each one effortlessly, glided across the room, and plopped down on her desk as if he wasn't scaring the god-holy hell out her!

"Calm down," The man hummed, "You can't possibly lay a hand on me in your condition."

Rukia wasn't listening; instead she was still hurling books his way and missing. That girl couldn't hit the side of barn if she was two feet away from it at this point. Once Rukia exhausted herself, the man dressed all in black laughed triumphantly.

"Now that I've got your attention," He purred, "Let's have a chat shall we?"

"HELP!" Rukia screamed at the top of her lungs, "HELP! ROBBER! THERE'S A BURGLAR IN MY ROOM! SOMEBODY PLEASE CALL 911! EMERGENCY! STUDENT IN DISTRESS!"

Quickly the man leapt over and clasped a gloved hand over Rukia's mouth. She froze when she looked up at his mask. The thin, silk garment covered every inch of his face making it difficult for Rukia to actually catch any of his features. On top of that, her dorm was dark as hell with her computer serving as the only light at the moment.

"Shh…" The man hissed, "I'm not going to hurt you or rob you."

Gently the masked gentleman sat Rukia on her bed and stood to his full height. The raven-haired girl gawked up at him while thinking of possible ways to escape the tiny dorm. She could jump out of the window…and break her neck. Or, she could run past him into the hallway! And then what? Start banging on random doors screaming "help"…wait a second that could work! Rukia kept that thought in mind as she waited for the man to speak.

"Do you know who I am?" He chuckled,

"Someone whose gonna get arrested if you don-"

"I'm the Sex Ninja, perhaps you've heard of me." He purred, Rukia's mouth almost hit the floor. So what Orihime said was true? So this whole thing was…was…real?

Rukia eyed the suspicious person standing in front of her; he was dressed in a black long-sleeve t-shirt, black jeans, black sneakers, and of course his mask. She silently gapped at him as he folded his arms.

"So, now that you've relaxed a bit, I've got some questions I want to ask you." The sex ninja said, Rukia didn't reply.

"First question, are you stressed with schoolwork?"

"_No_." Rukia replied snarkily, the ninja laughed again. He pulled a crumpled up piece of paper from his back pocket and held it out for Rukia to see. The raven-haired girl squinted her eyes and looked at the sheet; it was a copy of her course schedule!

"With classes like these," The ninja said, "I don't know how you wouldn't be stressed. Next question, when was the last time you had sex?"

Rukia sputtered and thought about that, "I think it was…um…uh…"

"If you have to think about it, it's been too long." The man dressed in black told her, and technically that was kinda true. If you can't remember the last time you got laid… then it's definitely time to drop your pants.

"My last question is…" The ninja said his tone serious, "Do you want my help or not? If you say yes, I'll make all your problems disappear. If you say no, I leave right now and you'll never see me again. So what's it gonna be, Rukia?"

For a moment, Rukia cocked an eyebrow at him. He was a ninja not a magician! He couldn't possibly make all her problems "disappear". Then again, Rukia was willing to try anything to get the weight of schoolwork off her shoulders. But she had a few questions of her own to ask…

"How many girls have you slept with?" Rukia demanded, she saw the ninja's shoulders rise and fall with a sigh.

"A few," He answered, "About as much as the next guy."

"Do you have any diseases?"

"Of course not!" He snapped, thoroughly offended, "I believe in promoting good sex, not _sickness_."

"How are you going to make my problems disappear? You're not exactly a genie."

Here, the sex ninja got down on one knee as if he was about to purpose to her. "But your wish is my command…"

Whatever happened in between time is not important. Just know this, Rukia was actually enjoying what was happening between her and infamous Sex Ninja!

"_Oh_ _my gaaawwwwddd_…." Rukia breathed into her pillow as the Ninja used his skillful hands to gently massage the knots and tension in her neck and shoulders. Somehow, he'd managed to work Rukia out of her t-shirt, flip her on her stomach, and give her the massage from heaven!

"I didn't ooohhh…." Rukia groaned, "You actually carry around massage oil?"

"A ninja is only as good as his weapons…" He replied with a titter, "You're so tense Rukia…I don't know why I waited so long to pay you a visit."

"_Me either…"_ Rukia thought actually smiling,

Once Rukia was thoroughly relaxed, the mysterious man gently turned her over. Rukia shyly covered her exposed body to him when she sat up.

"Is there anything else that you need, Rukia?" He purred huskily, never once had the ninja wanted to fuck a girl so badly. Oh there was something Rukia wanted all right, but she was too afraid to ask. The ninja could see the indecisiveness on her face and smiled behind his mask.

"I think I know what you want…but I'd have to take my mask off for it and I'm afraid I can't do that…" He said, believe it or not, Rukia was actually saddened by this. Her expression morphed into one of confusion when the ninja reached into his back pocket and pulled out a black blindfold.

"At least not with you being able to see me," He finished,

"Wait…hold on…" Before Rukia could even start protesting, the ninja tied the rag around her head thus successfully stealing her vision. A few tense moments pasted before Rukia felt a pair of hot lips collide with hers. A wise man once said when one sense is cut off, your other senses become stronger….well… that man was fucking genius. Rukia jumped from relaxation to sheer excitement as the ninja's warm lips began to move down her body. The raven-haired girl was practically paralyzed as the mystery man's mouth slid down her trembling body. The ninja inhaled Rukia's small breasts and flicked his tongue across her pert nipples. Rukia bit her lower lip against screaming in pleasure. Suddenly she felt his thick, hot tongue dip into her bellybutton. Rukia snatched her pillow from under her head and sank her teeth into it. She knew what was coming next.

The ninja curled his fingers around her shorts and pulled them away from her shaking legs. Rukia counted the seconds in her head as she felt the man grab both of her ankles and spread her legs wide.

"_Oh God…Oh God…Oh God…"_ Rukia thought, she bit down on her pillow and muffled a scream when the ninja sucked at her wet core. Rukia squirmed and rolled her hips against his mouth, she had practically swallowed a chunk of the pillow. The sound her quiet moans only egged the mysterious man on even more and he swirled his tongue in wide circles. Rukia couldn't hold out anymore, she cried out as he body clutched down itself and let her sweet juices flow into his mouth like liquid fire. The ninja greedily drank each searing drop and allowed Rukia to come down from her orgasm. The girl's legs were trembling as he quickly pulled his mask back over his head.

If Rukia had snatched the blindfold off a second earlier she would have seen the man behind the mask. She stared at the tall man in black as if she had never seen a ninja before! Wait that sounded odd…

"That was fun Rukia…but you almost saw my face…" The ninja purred, Rukia blinked at him.

"But I didn't!" She answered quickly,

"I'm afraid I have go now…" He said putting his foot on the window seal,

"Wait! Don't go!" Rukia begged, it too late. He'd leapt from the window like a cat to the ground below. Rukia scurried out of bed over to the window just in time to see him dashing across the grounds. He paused and turned back around momentarily. The Sex Ninja bowed like an actor who had just given the performance of his life and blew a sincere kiss to Rukia.

"We'll meet again…Rukia…I'm not finished with you yet..."

Then, he vanished into the night.

Rukia stood in her window, partially covered by the sheet on her bed. It was true…the Sex Ninja really did make her problems disappear, because instead of worrying about thesis papers and essays and portfilos…Rukia only wanted to know who that mysterious man was….

This experience was going to turn her into a sexaholic.

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><p>Gin Ichimaru climbed the open window of his dorm window and snatched his mask off his face. That was close call he had back there with Rukia. No girl had ever seen his face before, and even though Rukia hadn't seen it, she came very close.<p>

Gin had to learn to be more careful, ninjas aren't supposed to get caught!

THE END! (or is it?)

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><p><strong>Wicked:<strong> And this story was inspired by flamers?

**Lemony:** Yes ma'am. For some reason they get the creative juices flowing.

**Awesome:** *shakes head* *smacks hand on forehead* Just when I thought you gained some maturity...welcome back Lemony.

**Lemony:** Glad to be back! I'll never change, ahaha! I'm an inspiration to writers all over fanfiction who have been bullied by flamers and critics. Follow my example people: write what you want, when you want, and don't give a damn about negative people. The truth is, not everyone is going to like what you write. But if your readers like your work, keep writing to please them, not the flamers. This site is meant to fun, and it's not fun when someone is harassing you. With that said, I bid you ado and graciously thank all flamers for their opinions *blows kiss* and finally...DO DA STANKY LEG *dances*

**Wicked:** Lemony, I do believe you are caught somewhere between being an intellectual and an airhead. Its a mystery to science and a crime aganist nature.

**Lemony:** I LOVE YOU TOO WICKED! *still dancing*

**Awesome:** *shrugs* That's our sister...REVIEW!


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